This year, brother is on a decorating rampage... but like a poor kids decorating rampage. Our tree looks like a charlie brown christmas... and its new. And its in the kitchen. He pulled out all the stockings he could find- I have to say I have an awful lot of stockings with my name on them... why?
Anyways, he went to the parentals this weekend... I can't wait til he gets home to see what I have done. But, readers, imma need you to pray for me, cause if I die anytime before Christmas I am definitely, definitely going to hell.
Will post pics tomorrow!!
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Monday, November 28, 2011
TOOO many hugs- from sister
Here is the deal,
I don't like to be hugged. Outside of the idea of hugging a like dude that I am with or a friend I haven't seen in a long long time, I really dont' like to be hugged. I am more of a kiss on the cheek kinda girl.
I think my start of my hug hatred started with my mom. We are the same height, and she is a strong front hugger. She does this weird thing where she hunches up her shoulders trying to be like cute before she moves in for the kill. Makes me SO mad... its literally irritating me thinking of it. The REAL issue is, though, I dont like the idea of my mom and my boobs being pressed against each other. It makes me massively uncomfortable. I know it is ridiculous. But I am ridiculous... so its par for the course. (for example, I also very much don't want to breast feed IF i EVER have babies- which will happen by accident- my boobs are for fun, nothing else.)
Our family, particularly my weirdo brothers, are very big huggers though. Makes me wonder where I came from. Often the two will have long hugs to weird eachother out. It mostly makes the people around them uncomfortable. And sometimes, they attack hug, which makes me want to DIE. Sometimes it puts us in awkward situations... like at my grandmother's wake. I uncharacteristically hugged the littlest brother, and as I was brother came up and group hugged me. Then dad rushes over because he thinks I am crying. Then I felt like a douche because I was not crying.
See... hugs are never good.
So today, I particularly want to die. We have to keep in mind three things. 1. As stated I don't like hugs. 2. As stated, I am weird about my boobs. 3. (maybe stated in a previous post) I wear bras ALL THE TIME at home if brother is home. So normally when he comes home I like run in my bedroom and throw one on.
So today was an annoying, sad, frustrating night for me. Knowing this, brother came in to awkward hug me. BUT I DIDN'T HAVE A BRA ON!! The whole thing was awful. And awkward. But it made me remember our blog... so every negative has a positive!
I am back... thanks for reading!
I don't like to be hugged. Outside of the idea of hugging a like dude that I am with or a friend I haven't seen in a long long time, I really dont' like to be hugged. I am more of a kiss on the cheek kinda girl.
I think my start of my hug hatred started with my mom. We are the same height, and she is a strong front hugger. She does this weird thing where she hunches up her shoulders trying to be like cute before she moves in for the kill. Makes me SO mad... its literally irritating me thinking of it. The REAL issue is, though, I dont like the idea of my mom and my boobs being pressed against each other. It makes me massively uncomfortable. I know it is ridiculous. But I am ridiculous... so its par for the course. (for example, I also very much don't want to breast feed IF i EVER have babies- which will happen by accident- my boobs are for fun, nothing else.)
Our family, particularly my weirdo brothers, are very big huggers though. Makes me wonder where I came from. Often the two will have long hugs to weird eachother out. It mostly makes the people around them uncomfortable. And sometimes, they attack hug, which makes me want to DIE. Sometimes it puts us in awkward situations... like at my grandmother's wake. I uncharacteristically hugged the littlest brother, and as I was brother came up and group hugged me. Then dad rushes over because he thinks I am crying. Then I felt like a douche because I was not crying.
See... hugs are never good.
So today, I particularly want to die. We have to keep in mind three things. 1. As stated I don't like hugs. 2. As stated, I am weird about my boobs. 3. (maybe stated in a previous post) I wear bras ALL THE TIME at home if brother is home. So normally when he comes home I like run in my bedroom and throw one on.
So today was an annoying, sad, frustrating night for me. Knowing this, brother came in to awkward hug me. BUT I DIDN'T HAVE A BRA ON!! The whole thing was awful. And awkward. But it made me remember our blog... so every negative has a positive!
I am back... thanks for reading!
Saturday, August 27, 2011
what a cunt
Cunty McCunterson, AKA brother puts all my business out there.
I have a date tonight... I don't wanna talk about who it is with.
Anywho... this is what he posts on Facebook:
I have a date tonight... I don't wanna talk about who it is with.
Anywho... this is what he posts on Facebook:
what brother says about the hurricane
Brother and I have had quite a weird breakfast this fine Saturday.
After I told my brother how I met an adorable man last night, I quickly found out he was 23. As I am 29, Brother is 24, and we have theothersister between us, so this is awkward. I quickly became Matthew McConaughey for the remainder of the conversation. Then I say
"Am I a cougar"
Brother: "No but you will be in three years"
Me (After my face completely dropped) "I AM ONLY THREE YEARS AWAY FROM BEING A COUGAR?!!"
Brother: Yeah, you are almost ten years older"
And then he fell off the chair laughing.
Fucker.
Later:
Me: "Bristol RI is evacuating because of the upcoming hurricane"
Brother: "Why is everyone freaking out! 1- we are above sea-level (I tried to tell him that we are not in Bristol but whatever) and 2- we are white! nothing bad is going to happen to us! the government cares about us!"
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Can't tell twitter what I can tell my brother
Today I thought of two really funny, period related things that MAY be hysterical on twitter or people will write me off as the grossest person alive. One of the two. So I said to myself, eh, I will just text it to brother.
Instead I am putting it on here.
1st period thought: I really want to go to hot yoga today, but is hot yoga and period a savory mix? probably not. will I attract bears?
2nd- geez I made this french toast really sweet, I am consuming so much sugar right now! but a baby wants what a baby wants, even if its dying.
When you are willing to share those kind of thoughts with your brother and not the world... well you see my conundrum
Have a good day readers!
Instead I am putting it on here.
1st period thought: I really want to go to hot yoga today, but is hot yoga and period a savory mix? probably not. will I attract bears?
2nd- geez I made this french toast really sweet, I am consuming so much sugar right now! but a baby wants what a baby wants, even if its dying.
When you are willing to share those kind of thoughts with your brother and not the world... well you see my conundrum
Have a good day readers!
Monday, August 1, 2011
and we have developed a NEW most embarrassing moment.
Brother has now reached his most EMBARRASSING MOMENT OF ALL TIME...(say that in an echo-y voice please)
So my friend and I came back home one night and all the lights were on- and lets face it, I am the only wasteful one in the house and brother was here when I left, so I knew he was home. So I called out to him "brother?" and couldn't really find him... it was MUY confusing. So I turn the corner into the living room and see the most amazing site I have ever seen in my life.
I used my amazing quick thinking skills to make my friend stop in the dining room and just watched. I mean it was funny but I don't want to embarrass the boy (hush with the logic that I am posting this). And then I watched.
What do you think I saw? (and more importantly what do you think my friend thought I was seeing? gross)
Brother was mime karaoking. Seriously. Earphones in, singing along without actually singing. Holding a fake microphone. Dancing in circles. He looked up and saw me and the panic in his eyes was so amazing. He panicked and rushed around, trying to get himself situated. As he rushes out of the room, bam! meets a new person. In between my tears of laughter... and I am talking legit stomach and facing hurting, crying laughter, I explained that new friend did not see so there is a little less embarrassment. But still, he ran straight into his room. Poor guy.
That image of horror will forever be locked in my brain, it was fantastic. And bro, next time you are home alone, maybe you don't use the earphones. I could have been a murderer.
So my friend and I came back home one night and all the lights were on- and lets face it, I am the only wasteful one in the house and brother was here when I left, so I knew he was home. So I called out to him "brother?" and couldn't really find him... it was MUY confusing. So I turn the corner into the living room and see the most amazing site I have ever seen in my life.
I used my amazing quick thinking skills to make my friend stop in the dining room and just watched. I mean it was funny but I don't want to embarrass the boy (hush with the logic that I am posting this). And then I watched.
What do you think I saw? (and more importantly what do you think my friend thought I was seeing? gross)
Brother was mime karaoking. Seriously. Earphones in, singing along without actually singing. Holding a fake microphone. Dancing in circles. He looked up and saw me and the panic in his eyes was so amazing. He panicked and rushed around, trying to get himself situated. As he rushes out of the room, bam! meets a new person. In between my tears of laughter... and I am talking legit stomach and facing hurting, crying laughter, I explained that new friend did not see so there is a little less embarrassment. But still, he ran straight into his room. Poor guy.
That image of horror will forever be locked in my brain, it was fantastic. And bro, next time you are home alone, maybe you don't use the earphones. I could have been a murderer.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
answers to the weirdness
Okay first, I ran out of deodorant. ( I am extra poor and my mom was buying my basic essentials, including shampoo, lotion, and deodorant) I THOUGHT you were coming back on Sunday and I had just enough to get through Sunday... but nooooo you come back on Monday. So I don't even feel bad. Fuck you and your strong deodorant.
HOWEVER, you are clearly missing the MOST awkward part of this whole past week, my dear brother.
So I walk in brothers room and go "I need you to look at something and tell me if its a wart," sit on his bed, and proceed to show him the bottom of my foot. I look up in time to see the look of complete horror settle into a look of pure relief
Fucker thought I was going to show him a vaginal wart or something. Come on, I am not that bad! Plus I am psycho careful to make sure their is no brother/sister possibility of catching nudity! You know I even always have a bra on under my shirts! (and, for the record, there are no warts, foot or vagina related). Relax child.
I obviously have won the awkward-off though, since he thought I was gonna show my cooter. I WIN!!!!
HOWEVER, you are clearly missing the MOST awkward part of this whole past week, my dear brother.
So I walk in brothers room and go "I need you to look at something and tell me if its a wart," sit on his bed, and proceed to show him the bottom of my foot. I look up in time to see the look of complete horror settle into a look of pure relief
Fucker thought I was going to show him a vaginal wart or something. Come on, I am not that bad! Plus I am psycho careful to make sure their is no brother/sister possibility of catching nudity! You know I even always have a bra on under my shirts! (and, for the record, there are no warts, foot or vagina related). Relax child.
I obviously have won the awkward-off though, since he thought I was gonna show my cooter. I WIN!!!!
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